"Slowly I'm learning about the person I am, who I want to be with, and the kind of life I want to live"

I think I will always remember this quote from you. It stings, yet it sets an example for me to follow. It seems like I'm the only one who is taking this break up badly. You seem to be fine, moving on, having fun, finding yourself. And me? Half the time I'm stuck in the past, half the time I'm stuck in the present. I want to find out more about myself, and yet part of me can't let go. I'm trying to forget you, yet I know that is not the answer. Then what is the answer? When will I figure it out and how long will that take me. I want to grow, I need to grow yet all I seek is vengeance and acceptance from others. Some days I'll be fine, yet some days I ask myself, what is the purpose in life? I'm searching for distractions, yet I'm not satisfied with my results. I'm still too hung up on you. The past is something I have always been able to cover up, yet I don't want to bury the hole that is three years of my life. You seem to ease casually into it, yet for me, I hit rocks and bumps wherever I go. With every bit of me, I wish I was over it. I feel this is something I'll be struggling all throughout senior year of college. Maybe one day I will be able to get over it. Just one day. I see my friends all progressed and get happier each day and more confident. I am too, on the outside, but on the inside, I make backward progress. I'm insecure all over again, there is no substance, no emotion. I'm still lost and sometimes it is a bit hard to pick me up. Therefore I resort to blogging for I feel it is the only option I have to express what I feel for sometimes I bother my friends too much. One day I will be fine. Just one day. Let me know when.